Neither disillusion nor self-delusion

Job 23:1-9, 16-17

Then Job answered:

2 “Today also my complaint is bitter;    his hand is heavy despite my groaning.

3 Oh, that I knew where I might find him,    that I might come even to his dwelling!

4 I would lay my case before him    and fill my mouth with arguments.

5 I would learn what he would answer me    and understand what he would say to me.

6 Would he contend with me in the greatness of his power?    No, but he would give heed to me.

7 There the upright could reason with him,    and I should be acquitted forever by my judge.

8 “If I go forward, he is not there;    or backward, I cannot perceive him;

9 on the left he hides, and I cannot behold him;    I turn to the right, but I cannot see him.

16 God has made my heart faint;

the Almighty has terrified me.

17 If only I could vanish in darkness,

    and thick darkness would cover my face![

Hebrews 4:12-16

12 Indeed, the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing until it divides soul from spirit, joints from marrow; it is able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And before him no creature is hidden, but all are naked and laid bare to the eyes of the one to whom we must render an account.

14 Since, then, we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast to our confession. 15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Mark 10:17-31

17 As he was setting out on a journey, a man ran up and knelt before him and asked him, “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” 18 Jesus said to him, “Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone. 19 You know the commandments: ‘You shall not murder. You shall not commit adultery. You shall not steal. You shall not bear false witness. You shall not defraud. Honor your father and mother.’ ” 20 He said to him, “Teacher, I have kept all these since my youth.” 21 Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said, “You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.” 22 When he heard this, he was shocked and went away grieving, for he had many possessions.

23 Then Jesus looked around and said to his disciples, “How hard it will be for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!” 24 And the disciples were perplexed at these words. But Jesus said to them again, “Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! 25 It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” 26 They were greatly astounded and said to one another, “Then who can be saved?” 27 Jesus looked at them and said, “For mortals it is impossible, but not for God; for God all things are possible.”

28 Peter began to say to him, “Look, we have left everything and followed you.” 29 Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for my sake and for the sake of the good news 30 who will not receive a hundredfold now in this age—houses, brothers and sisters, mothers and children, and fields, with persecutions—and in the age to come eternal life. 31 But many who are first will be last, and the last will be first.”

To begin, a few important questions: If there is indeed a God, what is the nature of God’s relationship to us?  And, in turn, how should we relate to God?  What do we expect from God?  

In my experience there are two primary ways of trying to answer these essential questions that exist in tension, with one another. And just to warn you, I’m aware that I’m gong to oversimplify the contrast in order to make my point.  

On the one hand, we can emphasize God’s transcendence, that God is infinite and far beyond all we could begin to imagine, that God is essentially inaccessible to us, an inscrutable mystery.  God created the world long ago, established its laws, set things in motion, but now God’s interaction with his creation is largely indiscernible.  I must confess to being drawn to this way of thinking and experiencing the world, to the God of academic philosophy.  Of course, the danger here is falling into mere deism, the notion that God is known by reason only, not by revelation.  God doesn’t really relate to us, so we don’t really relate to God.  There are low expectations.  

On the other hand, we can emphasize God’s immanence, that God is near to us, that God isn’t just knowable but readily makes himself known, that God desires nothing more than to relate to us.  And the most important thing we can do then is relate to God, to talk to God, to spend time with God.  We pray to God expecting a response, to find comfort and assurance as we would from a loving friend.  The danger here is exactly the opposite, that we make God not an objective reality but a subjective experience - an experience that can be had simply if you open yourself to it.  Here there are high expectations - expectations, which, I think are often not met even as we feel the pressure to convince ourselves and others than they have been.   If you emphasize God’s relationality, it’s quite the problem if God doesn’t seem to be relating to you. 

Now you might be thinking that this is a false dichotomy, that because we are Christians we can hold together both God’s transcendence and God’s immanence exactly because the infinite, enteral God took on temporal, human form in the person of Jesus, that the transcendent God became immanent when the Word become flesh.  The book of Hebrews speaks of Jesus as our great high priest, who has come from heaven and yet experienced the human condition - he can sympathize with our weaknesses - and who has returned to heaven to appeal to God on our behalf, empowering us to “approach the throne of grace with boldness” confident that we’ll receive the mercy and grace we need.  

To me that’s a very satisfying, even beautiful, theological answer - I wanted to call this church, Incarnation, after all - even as it seems clear to me that I and just about everyone else finds it difficult to live within that resolved tension.  We find ourselves pulled in one direction or another. 

Consider how we think about Job, especially his words in the passage we read.  My impulse is simply to read Job dispassionately, to consider what theological point is being made, rather than to imagine the sufferings of this man and to consider his words in that light.  Here is a man desperately trying to relate to God, and I’m thinking, “Well, what do you expect, Job? Do you think God hears and responds?  Just be a bit more stoic and you’ll fell better.”  Relating to God can seem a waste of time, just setting yourself up for disappointment.  

But those who are not like me, who want and expect God to relate to them, might read Job’s words and be shocked by the forcefulness of his accusations, by the bleakness of his outlook.  He’s way too impolite, too impious.  Cheer up Job!  Don’t you know God loves you and hears you!  I’ve spent a lot of time amongst people who talk about a personal relationship with Jesus, but I’ve never heard anyone speak to him like this.  Maybe it’s because they didn’t suffer like Job, or maybe they utter such words in private, but my suspicion is that talking to God like Job does involves the unsettling admission that God often seems absent, even hidden.  A relationship with God naturally involves a kind of disappointment, and disappointment with God is a reality many Christians deny.  

Job is clearly disappointed with God, and he’s going to let God know about it.  Having already lost everything, Job has no time for pretense.  What more disappointment can he suffer at this point?  And he’s way past pretending like his relationship with God is going swimmingly.  And here  he finds a freedom, though at an unimaginable cost.  

We read the story of the wealthy man who comes to Jesus asking what he must do to inherit eternal life.  This man is primarily seen as a negative example, but he has the virtue of being aware, at some level, of his lack and of coming to Jesus seeking an answer.  And he risks asking a question to which he might not like the answer.  We often go seeking answers elsewhere, or fear to ask because we suspect we won’t like the response.  Better to not hear the truth.  Of course, this man didn’t like the answer he got and went away sad, apparently because - understandably - he didn’t want to liquidate his assets.   It’s not merely that he loves his possessions, but that he thinks he’s in a position to secure his future and that following Jesus’ instructions would make his future less secure, not more.  Job, of course, harbors no such illusions.  

Job wishes he could find God so that he could make his case; he wants God to hear his arguments and he wants to hear God’s answer.  He believes he ought to be able to reason with God, and - remarkably - that God would acquit him, that God would agree that Job didn’t deserve to suffer like this.  He’s desperate for God to say something, anything.  But, Job’s search is in vain; no matter where he looks, God remains hidden.  And by the end of the passage Job wishes that finally this darkness would swallow him and that he would be no more.  A grim sentiment, but then Job keeps on living.

There is no question that Job speaks out of his suffering.  Pain is oppressive, and it distorts our sense of reality; your world closes in on itself until all you know is your pain.  I say this as someone who has suffered little myself, but the accounts of others make this truth obvious.  Perhaps you’ve been there yourself - perhaps you’re there now.  And when we meet those who are really suffering, we might remember not to present God as an easy solution to their suffering, but as they very One who eludes them.

At the same time, though Job seems an extreme case, his life reveals the reality of the human condition: that God is the source and sustainer of everything, God is our only hope, and yet God can seem very hard to find.  And I want to suggest that Job provides us an example of how to relate to God, not just when we’ve suffered loss, but any time - which should be all the time - that we long for God to show up.  Rather than merely being given permission to relate to God like this in extreme instances, it just may be that relating to God like this is necessary.   Job maintains high expectations for God even as he complains to God.  In fact, complaining to God reveals those expectations.  It is a defiant act of faith.  

I want this to be a community where we live and move and have our being as if God really was, is, and will be revealed in Jesus even as we also acknowledge the frustrating, disconcerting reality that God so often remains out of sight.   And rather than leading to either disillusionment with God or willful self-delusion, we just keep on trying to be faithful, and we might take come comfort knowing that Jesus himself, while on the cross, cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me.”